Once Upon a Time There Was A Boy Named Link
by HylianHero128
Summary: A collection of randon stories starring Link.


This is another story, well, collection of stoires, spawned from an MSN convo.this time, i was talking to my friend val, who also has an account here at ff. net.i just started typing random things about link, and then they started transforming into stories. ive tried to keep this thing more or less in its original form. ive deleted all thebits of our convothat werent part of my story, but kept some parts. i hope you enjoy this. :). i hyes, almost forgot. harry potter and lotr characters appear.

**Once Upon a Time There Was a Boy Named Link…  
**_By: HylianHero128  
__With help from: Random.Val_

once upon a time

there was a boy named link

who loved zelda

but zelda loved marth

who loved roy

who loved zelda too

so linka nd roy fought for zelda's affections

while zelda pursued marth

while marth pursured roy

who really had no interest in marth at all

and then samus and peach came along

and roy loved peach

and zelda got mad

cuz he didnt love her anymore

even though she didnt love him

and samus was a loner

so now link loved zelda, who still loved marth, who still oved roy, who now loves peach

little did roy kno know that marth was startikng to like peach too

and samus is still a loner

the end

---

once upon a time

there was a boy named link

who loved roy

who loved marth

who loved link

but zelda also loved link

and peach loved roy

so as link chased after roy, roy chased after marth, and marth chased after roy, so they spent days on end running around in circles chasing each other

while zelda and peach watched, drooling cuz they loved link and roy

then zelda started chasing link, which got marth mad, so marth killed zelda

and zelda was brought back to life with a fairy

from link

and link realized he loved zelda

which made marth even more mad

and all the while, roy was sad cuz the circle broke, so peach consoled him, and they had sex, and roy loved peach

and marth was a loner

the end

---

once upon a time...

there was a boy named link

who fell in love with harry potter

no wait

no

scratch that

the end

---

once upon a time...

there was a boy named link

who wrote a fanfiction

about him zelda and roy having wild sex

in a starbucks

while valerie would ask for a muffin with a coffee bean in it

this is where i com in

cuz i am the bean

as valerie waits at the counter for her muffin

peach enters and joins link zelda and roy

and they have a foursome

and then marth comes in, just getting back from a photoshoot , cuz he's a pretty boy

and he sees zelda link roy and peach having sex

so he gets his camera...

and takes a picture of

valerie, who finally got her muffin

and they sit and have tea

talking in english accents

and sticking their pinkies out

and then link stumbles from his table and asks for the muffin

so valerie gives it to him

and he eats it

so now im inside link

and then he goes back to having sex

and valerie and marth drink tea

talking in english accents

with their pinkies sticking out

the end…

---

Val: THAT BASTARD

Val: he ate my precious muffin that I paid for

Me: ok ok, so i'll write a sequel, and you shall get ur precious muffin back

---

once upon a time

there was a boy named link

and he ate valerie's mufin

and then valerie got upset

so she stomped over to link zelda roy and peach, who were still having sex

and she grabbed link by the throat

and shook him screaming MUFFIN

and she shoved her hand down his throat into his stomach

and pulled it back out

before it got digested

and saved me

link doesnt feel like haveing sex anymore, so he buys a frappucinno to soothe his throat cuz val's nails scratched it

and roy has sex with zelda and peach

as peach is having sex, she starts thinking about her name

peach

and suddenly feels like a peach muffin

so POOF

she becomes a muffin

like me

and so zelda and roy are having sex

while Peach muffin and muffin with coffee bean inside talk

as link gargled his frap, marth got bored and decided to join roy and zelda

but zelda was done

so roy and marth had sex while zelda ate a cookie

and she played chess

by herself

because she is schizophrenic

meanwhile, valerie is listening to the muffins' conversation

Val: schizophrenic whats that

Me: not sure

Val: lol

Me: anyways

while link still drinks his frap

zelda decides to look up shcizophrenia in the dictionary so she can tell Valerie what it means

as zelda looked in the C section for shcizophrenia, aragorn, legolas and gandalf walk in

and hurriedly run out, because roy and marth were having sex in a starbucks

and valerie was talking to two muffins

and zelda was suffereing from shcizophrenia

and link was gargling a frappucinno

and then gandalf suggest they all kill themselves because they are now scarred for life seeing so many scary things in the same starbucks

but the decide to get coffee instead

so they go to tim hortons

and when they get their coffee, tim horton's gets enough money to buy out starbucks

and it becomes timbucks

and then gandalf thought that was funny

cuz it reminded him of timbuktu

so he ditched aragorn and legolas and went to africa

and got lost

and eatn by lions

aragorn and legolas continue to mt. doom

while zelda frantically seraches through "F" to find shcizophrenia

in an atlas

upside-down

thats written in latin

as link gets a frappucinno, which have now been renamed, and they are now ice capps

-sigh-

and the craziness continues in the timbucks

forever

the end

* * *

there are some inside jokes in the last one, the first being the part where i was a coffee bean. i doo not remember why i was a coffee bean though, all i remember was that me and val were walking home from school, and theres a starbucks on the way, and we happened to pass it. and yea. the second insider is the lotr part. see, we were exploring in the ravine behind our school with a few other ppl, and we decided to be ppl from lotr. i was aragorn and val was pippin. there was someinthg i forgot about the last story as i was writing it. i forgot that it was actually all a fanfic link wrote... lol. anways, i hope you enjoyed this mindless random thingamabobber.

-HylianHero128


End file.
